Birthday Spree
by T. A. Aberforth
Summary: Blaine gets Kurt the best birthday present he's ever had. Blaine gets to share the fun. CanniBlaine/Kurt, SerialKiller!Klaine, and rated M for a very good reason.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N- That's right, I'm jumping on the SerialKiller!Klaine train/bandwagon. Hopefully you shall hop aboard too, if you're not already on. I own nothing. I just like to make Kurt and Blaine do sick, twisted thing to each other and random victims. Rated M for graphic blood, gore, murder, self-harm, cannibalism, sex, swearing, and general insanity. Not for the kiddies. I mean it. This is more graphic than Sweeney Todd.**

Kurt awoke that morning with a huge smile on his face, having a feeling this was going to be the best birthday yet. There was a wonderful smell enveloping him, the scent of a freshly blood-soaked pillow stuffed under his head. He buried his face in it, reveling in the aroma of fear, the metallic taste of a new victim. Kurt sighed, silently thanking whoever the hell was listening for blessing him with a boyfriend like Blaine.

Reluctantly, he stood, in only boxers and a t-shirt, with blood still coving his face, and headed to the kitchen. However, there was a trail of flesh leading in the opposite direction, and upon closer inspection, Kurt discovered it to be fingers, all pointing to their special room. He giggled, appreciating the creativity and humor Blaine put into it. Following the trail, Kurt was lead to a small, circular chamber with a drain in the very middle. On top of the drain stood his boyfriend, in front of three people, naked, gagged, and chained to the ceiling and floor, all below a banner that read 'Happy Birthday' in dripping red blood.

Kurt felt a grin about to break his face. "You really went all out this year, did you?" He stepped closer, placing his hands on Blaine's waist.

"It gets better," Blaine pecked him on the cheek, then turned to the man in the middle and gestured to him.

It took Kurt a second to realize who was behind the mask of fear and the ball gag. "Karofsky?" He turned back to Blaine, kissing him full on the mouth. "How did you...?"

"Let's just say I know a guy," They both got a chuckle out of that. "Do you like it?"

"I love it. I love you." Kurt sighed. "It's perfect." Blaine handed him his favorite knife, a small Swiss Army blade that he'd killed his first victim with, which he took happily. Grabbing Blaine's arm, he carefully carved a small heart just below his wrist. They both hissed in pleasure, watching the blood drip for a moment before Kurt put the gash to his mouth and sucked, groaning as Blaine's lifeblood slowly seeped into his mouth. After a moment, he dropped his arm and stepped closer to the boy who'd made his life a living hell not too long ago, untying his gag. "Hello David! How nice of you to join me on my birthday! Did you get me a gift?"

"Fuck..." Dave whimpered at the half-crazed look in his eyes.

"I'll take that as a no... But it's okay, Davey! You can be my present!" Kurt smiled, running the tip of his blade over his leg before driving it in just above his knee. Karofsky howled in pain at blood squirted out harshly. Kurt's grin expanded and he repeated the motion with the other leg. He paused. "Who else did you bring me?"

Blaine gestured to a large, limp, black boy. "Azimio." Karofsky whimpered again at the mention of his best friend. "And Finn."

Kurt sighed again, the tone laced with happiness. He slashed a small wound on his index finger, holding it up to Blaine and letting him slurp the blood from it. "You are the best."

"I know. Do you want anything special for breakfast?"

"Waffles sound good. By the way, nice job on the fingers. Very creative. Whose were they?"

"They were left over from that woman last week. The blood on your pillow was fresh from Finn, though. I tried not to make the wound too noticeable."

"You can help, you know."

"Really?"

"Of course. I want to share my present. But Davey..." he turned to the ex-jock. "You're all mine." He slashed the boy's calf slowly, reveling in the screams drawn from his tormentor, the begs and pleas for mercy. Kurt smirked cruelly, knowing exactly what to do now. He drew the knife back up his leg, never removing it from contact with the homophobe's skin, and began to carve words.

_Gay._

**Homosexual.**

Faggot.

_Queer._

"Please, stop, I'm sorry, I'm s-s-sorry, Kurt."

"Sorry for what, Davey? Making my life a living hell? Telling me you were going to kill me? Sort of like what I'm doing now?" Kurt's voice was tight, controlled.

"W-what?"

Kurt laughed. "You don't honestly think I'm going to let you go, do you?" Looking into his former bully's eyes, he found that to be exactly true, and laughed harder. "Oh, god, I always knew you were stupid, but really?" He rewarded this stupidity with a slow, deep cut to the face, right across his cheek. Almost lovingly, he caressed the bleeding jaw, smearing blood everywhere. Taking Karofsky's hand, Kurt deliberately began to saw at the fingers. Screams filled the room, long and agonized, but the 'Vitamin D' Blaine had slightly overdosed him on wouldn't allow him to pass out.

Blaine just sat back and watched. He loved to see Kurt in control like this, every move perfectly calculated to draw the maximum amount of agony. Each cut of the knife dug deeper, never hitting an artery or vein, careful not to let too much blood spill out that he would die before the fun was over. Kurt was stunning mid-murder. It only served to make Blaine harder.

Kurt put the knife to his lips and licked it. It tasted bitter with fear and pain, just the way he liked it. He glanced over his shoulder at his lover. "Feel free to join in anytime you want to, babe."

"I thought you didn't want to share." Blaine beamed at the bloody face he loved.

"I'm in a generous mood today." Kurt grinned back, pulling him in for a searing kiss. He moaned as Blaine bit his tongue, hard enough to draw blood. In response, he nipped at his lower lip with canines filed for that specific reason.

"Fucking fags..." Karofsky choked out behind a sob. Without breaking the kiss, Kurt shoved the knife in his shoulder and left it there. Karofsky howled in response, turning on the two boys even more.

"Fuck... want you right now," Kurt moaned, slicing at Blaine's stomach with sharpened nails.

"What about your presents?" Blaine asked, pulling out his straight razor and running it over Kurt's bare thigh, leaving a thin red line in its wake.

"They can wait. Fuck me, _now._" Blaine dropped to his knees in front of Kurt, licking up the blood running down his thigh. He pulled down the boxers and took the large hard-on into his mouth all at once, swallowing around it. Kurt moaned loudly, and in no time at all, he was coming with a loud groan down Blaine's throat. Blaine swallowed every drop, standing up to kiss his boyfriend once again. When they broke apart, Kurt smiled, turning back to his victims. "Best birthday ever."

**A/N2- And that is what happens when you spend all night Googling "CanniBlaine" and "SerialKlaine", drink 3 cans of Monster at 3:00 in the morning, get 2 hours of sleep, and go to Starbucks. I did warn you about the graphicness. I am also now questioning my sanity in thinking of these things. It comes more natural than anything else I've ever written before and I'm starting to scare myself. Anyway, what did you think? Was it any good? Please review and tell me!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N- Wow, you guys. I was seriously just going to make that an oneshot, but since you loved it so much, I'm turning it into a FULL BLOWN STORY. That's right. I swore I wasn't going to post a full story until I finished all of my other stories, but I really liked this one. Plus, you guys inspired me. Thank you all so much for the reviews! It has the third most out of all 21 of my other stories! You guys are sick, sick people. Please don't ever change. Now read the blood and gore we sick people all love. The cannibalism gets way deeper in this chapter, though. Special thanks to my big sister who came up with the title and wants me to mention her now since I forgot to in chapter one. Oh right, I won nothing, especially not Llamas With Hats or Glee.**

**Also, some people were asking why Finn was about to be brutally tortured and murdered. Well, this is very AU and Carole and Burt never got married. So let's just say that Kurt held a grudge to everyone who ever bullied him in the slightest form, and calling him a fag qualifies as bullying to me. So basically, there will be a lot of murdering. If you would like me to kill off someone specifically, tell me in a review! I already have plans for Rachel, Jacob, and sequel to this story! You may see a few surprise characters that I really enjoyed writing.**

**Rated M for the following: Cannibalism, murder, sex, swearing, torture, bondage, insanity, self-harm, slight BDSM... erm, I think that covers it.**

When he bored of Karofsky's screams and pleas of mercy, (and that wasn't for awhile), Kurt drove the blade into his throat slowly. Blaine grinned as he watched Kurt's face light up with the purest delight, blood spurting on his face. It was so damn sexy watching Kurt go in for the kill. He went up behind the countertenor, wrapping his arms around his waist. "Good job."

"Well, I try." Kurt beamed back. "I think I've worked up quite an appetite. If you make the waffles, I'll make the sausages."

Blaine started toward the kitchen, and Kurt walked over to the seemingly blank wall with metal handles. Pulling on one, he reached into the drawer and selected a particularly sharp butcher knife. He shut that drawer and opened another, this one containing a miniature meat grinder. Smirking, Kurt strode back over to the now limp body of Karofsky, unchained him, and began to slice off the skin and muscle of his shoulders. It was Blaine's favorite part, and he figured since he'd gotten such a wonderful present, it would be appreciated. Kurt started working the meat though the grinder slowly after putting a plate underneath to catch the byproduct. '_Three times through,'_ He reminded himself. Humming 'Epiphany' from Sweeney Todd softly, Kurt glanced up as Azimio groaned behind his gag, waking up. He ignored the muffled screams for help and continued grinding. When he finished, he shaped the meat into 4 small patties, grabbed the plate, and stood up.

Striding into the kitchen, Kurt found another surprise, about twenty or so roasted faces hanging from multicolored balloons. "The decorations are wonderful." He murmured, kissing Blaine on the cheek. His boyfriend was almost finished making the waffles, and a pan was already warm on the stove. Kurt softly bumped his shoulder and moved to cook the Karofsky-sausages.

It wasn't long before breakfast was done, and the giddy lovers sat down to a meal of Karofsky-sausage, scrambled eggs, blood oranges, and Belgian waffles (with bloody syrup.) While they made small talk, a tiny yellow canary fluttered in and landed on Kurt's shoulder. "Hey Pavi," Kurt said, touching the bird's head lightly. Pavarotti chirped softly in response and pecked at his finger before flying off again.

"I don't think Pavarotti likes me very much..." Blaine commented, taking a bite of sausage. "He never lands on my shoulder, or sings with me, or steals my breakfast."

"What?" Glancing down, Kurt saw that his second sausage was gone. He gaped. "That's so rude!"

"What do you expect? All you feed him is glitter. He's probably going to eat the rest of Karofsky now."

"He likes glitter! Besides, do you want the house to be covered in canary shit? If I don't let him fly around, he goes crazy in that little cage. It's not fair." Kurt pouted, but it was hard to take him seriously when blood covered every inch of his face. To Blaine, it only served to make him more attractive. Honestly, he just wanted to push him up against the nearest flat surface and ravish the younger boy.

So he did.

Blaine stood suddenly, startling Kurt. He yanked the confused countertenor to his feet and kissed him again, biting harshly. Kurt squealed. He loved being dominated. Heat flooded both boys and they began to thrust into each other's hips simultaneously. Blaine was pushing him into the bedroom, onto the bed, pinning him down. Clothes were ripped off at lightning speed. Kurt's head spun, barely registering the fact that Blaine was handcuffing him to the bed on his knees, or that his legs were being spread widely, or that Blaine was thrusting into him harshly.

Okay, the last one kind of registered.

It was rough, hard, painful, and filling to the brim. And Kurt loved every second of it, giving the reigns to someone else to take control. He loved the bruises he was sure to get the next morning. And he defiantly loved Blaine carving the word 'MINE' into his the side of his hip while still thrusting into him, making him come with a scream to wake the dead. White spots blinked in front of his eyes, and as he clenched down on Blaine, his lover came too, digging the blade in deeper.

"Fuck..." Kurt breathed.

"Yeah..." Blaine whispered, slowly pulling out, making Kurt whimper in loss. He started to remove the knife, but Kurt stopped him.

"Leave it in." He said, smirking. "I want to bleed for you."

"Alright. Ready to go back downstairs?"

"Yeah, Azimio woke up while I was still in there. He must be terrified by now."

"Good."

"I know. I love it when I can actually smell the fear. It's palpable." Blaine uncuffed his boyfriend and kissed him. "God, I love you, Blaine."

"I love you, too, babe." Blaine groaned softly. "C'mon, let's get dressed."

Kurt was right. And he loved being right.

Azimio was terrified by the time they got back downstairs. It was palpable, mostly because he'd pissed his figurative pants in fear. Kurt ungagged him, and as predicted, an immediate stream of swearing and attempted intimidation came out. It was almost funny.

Alright, it was fucking hilarious to watch a chained, naked, completely helpless man attempt to scare them. The duo burst into laughter for a good few minutes before Blaine wiped tears from his face and went to fetch a scalpel and a small bone saw. The doorbell rang, twice in rapid succession. "It's Jesse." Kurt somehow always knew exactly who was at the door just by the way they rung the bell. "I'll get it." After breakfast and more, Kurt had cleaned up a bit, dressing in dark clothes that wouldn't stain, and, sadly for Blaine, washing the blood off of his face.

"Hello, Jesse," Kurt smiled warmly at the Broadway star. Time had certainly been good to his handsome face, and at twenty-four years old, he had the look of a young Ryan Gosling. But with much better cheekbones.

"Happy birthday." He moved to hug the birthday boy in question, who accepted happily. After they'd gotten over their differences in high school, the pair had become the best of friends. There was a squeal from behind Jesse, and, stepping out of the hug, Kurt discovered a hitchhiker to the happy reunion. "Brittany!"

"Kurtie!" The former Cheerio glomped onto her dolphin with surprising strength. "Happy birthday, boo!"

"Thanks, guys. I wasn't expecting you until later... I'm sort of in the middle of something right now." Kurt said, blushing slightly. "The party doesn't start until four."

"No, the party doesn't start until I walk in." Brittany corrected me.

"It's 4:10." Jesse commented.

"But we brought you a present." Britt tilted her head carefully. "Do you want it now?"

Jesse and Brittany knew exactly what Kurt and Blaine did, even occasionally bring them victims. They didn't skimp on his birthday, either. "Sure."

He peered around the duo and gasped when he saw who was tied up and unconscious. "Rachel?" He gasped, glancing at Jesse. "How?"

"It was horrible. I dated her for about two weeks to make sure she would trust me. You totally owe me on this, Hummel." Jesse grimaced.

He smiled. "You're awesome."

"Yeah, yeah. Brittany beat me this year, though."

Kurt tilted his head. "How?"

"I brought Jacob." She piped up. "But my cat might know, she's always reading my diary."

"I love you guys." Kurt motioned with my arms for a group hug, which was quickly enforced. "Let's go play."

**A/N2-More blood and gore to come soon, you sick freaks. Don't forget to review! Or I'll send Kurt and Blaine after you... Meheheheheh.**

**In the next chapter: We see some more of our favorite Gleeks! But who's in on it and who's the victims? (Insert creepy music here.)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Kurt's POV**

"Okay, guys. Party's over." Blaine began to shoo everyone out of the basement, where several dismembered, decapitated, and generally mutilated carcasses littered the floor. I sat cross-legged in the center of it all. I'd never felt so alive.

Once everyone had left, Blaine shut the door and walked to my side, squatting next to me and tilting my face upwards for a soft, metallic-twanged kiss. "Good birthday?"

"Great birthday. Thank you, Blaine Warbler." I replied mischievously.

His eyes glinted dangerously. "Kurt, how many times do I have to tell you not to call me that? Do I need to teach you another lesson?"

"No..." I trailed off softly before yawning. "Mmm... I'm tired."

"I got you," Blaine replied, scooping me into his arms and carrying me up the stairs. He set me on the bed and moved to play a DVD. When the opening credits began to start up as he settled into bed next to me, I giggled.

"Dexter? Really, Blaine? We're watching Dexter, of all things?"

"I figured you were getting tired of Sweeney Todd. I mean, Tim Burton is genius, but the special effects in that movie were fucking terrible. The blood was nowhere near realistic, the camera angles left something to be desired, and the fact that they lived in dirty old London was no excuse for shitty lighting." Blaine stopped his rant, the maniacal light fading somewhat from his eyes. I just laughed again and pulled him closer to snuggle. We disregarded the fact that we were soaked to the bone in the blood of Rachel, Finn, Azimio, Jacob, and countless others that we'd killed tonight. The party had lasted for hours.

"I am getting tired of Sweeney Todd. I mean, there's only so much Johnny Depp autotuning that I can handle."

"Well, I suppose you'll love your next gift then..." Blaine reached into the bedside drawer and pulled out a pair of tickets. My jaw dropped.

"Broadway?" I squeaked.

"With Patti LuPone as Mrs. Lovett herself." He grinned cheekily.

"Holy shit, Blaine!" I glomped onto my boyfriend tightly, peppering every inch of skin I could get to with kisses. "I love you so fucking much, you are the best boyfriend ever, you know that?"

"I know." Blaine smirked.

"Shut up. You're supposed to be modest." I smacked his shoulder lightly.

"I'm nothing if not cocky."

"You got that right..." I let my hand trail downwards to squeeze at his crotch.

"Kurt," he growled, low and dangerous at me. "Don't start something you're not ready to finish."

"I fully plan on finishing this, Mr. Anderson." I snarled back, pushing him down on his back and letting my eyes flash fully black with adrenaline.

Blaine's eyes clouded over fully black as well. "Good."

With that, we let our demons run free and rampant.

XOXOXOXO

**A/N- 4 millions times apologies for the wait and shortness. But that's it. It's over. Hope you liked the ending and the SerialKiller/Cannibal/Demon!Klaine.**

**I have a sick and twisted mind for writing this.**

**Please review.**


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